All Business is Personal: Developing (not so obvious) Core Leadership Skills
Written by Angela Bryan, MS, CMHC
Maintaining professional composure is essential for business leaders, but it often comes at a cost to their physical, mental, and family well-being. Pushing through constant challenges regardless of personal struggles can lead to toxic stress levels and emotional strain. Modern neuroscience teaches us that true professionalism involves personal growth and self-care, allowing leaders to show up authentically and effectively in both work and personal life. Shore Coaching explores four uncommon yet crucial leadership skills in this series to help you become a more impactful and attuned leader.
Gratitude (creating positive brain loops in myself and others)
Self-Regulation (knowing my triggers and changing them)
Imperfection (failing is growth)
Fostering difference (harnessing diversity to improve my team)
Part 2 - Self-Regulation (knowing my triggers and changing them)
Picture this: Erik, a seasoned project manager, finds himself in a high-stakes meeting, presenting a critical project update to senior stakeholders when one of his team members challenges something he says. Immediately, Erik notices a subtle shift in his state—the tightening of his chest, the quickening of his breath. Without warning, frustration creeps in. At that moment, Erik feels an overwhelming surge of defensiveness and anger, and an intense emotional reaction clouds his rational thinking, causing him to lose his train of thought and his cool.
This scenario underscores a fundamental truth in leadership: understanding one's triggers is paramount for effective leadership in team dynamics. Just as Erik grapples with his emotional response during the meeting, leaders across industries encounter similar challenges in navigating trigger-laden situations with their teams. By delving into the neuroscience behind triggers and adopting proactive management strategies, leaders can harness their emotional intelligence to foster connection, collaboration, innovation, and create psychological safety on their teams that will lead them to better outcomes.
Understanding how triggers operate in the brain is crucial for leaders aiming to navigate team dynamics effectively. Here's an in-depth look at how triggers function neurologically and practical steps for managing them to help us become better leaders.
How it works
Neurobiology of Triggers: Triggers are stimuli that activate our brain's threat detection system, primarily centered in the amygdala—the brain's emotional control center. When triggered, the amygdala initiates the release of stress hormones, preparing the body for a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response. This primitive survival mechanism helped our ancestors react swiftly to threats but can lead to unproductive responses in modern workplace settings.
The Role of Neural Pathways: Over time, repeated exposure to specific triggers creates neural pathways in the brain, forming automatic behavioral responses. These pathways are reinforced each time the trigger is encountered, making the reaction more ingrained and difficult to control. Understanding this process helps leaders recognize that triggers are not simply external events but internalized response patterns that will not just go away but must be addressed intentionally.
Impact on Decision-Making, Emotion Control, and the Ability to Stay Professional: Triggers can hijack the brain's rational decision-making and body and emotion control processes, leading to impulsive or irrational behavior. When triggered, the prefrontal cortex—the brain region responsible for higher-order thinking and decision-making—becomes inhibited, while the amygdala takes over, prioritizing survival instincts over reasoned judgment. This neurological shift can impair leaders' ability to make sound decisions in high-pressure situations.
Knowing your triggers and changing them
Identifying triggers in the workplace is crucial for maintaining emotional well-being and effective communication. Here are some tips to help you recognize your triggers:
Reflect on Past Experiences: Take some time to think about situations in the past where you've felt particularly stressed, upset, or angry in the workplace. What were the circumstances surrounding those moments? Identifying patterns can help you recognize potential triggers.
Pay Attention to Physical Reactions: Notice how your body reacts to certain situations at work. Do you experience tension, rapid heartbeat, sweating, tension in your neck or jaw, shrugged shoulders, a pit in your stomach, or other physical symptoms? These are likely signs that your brain “down shifted” into protective and survival mode.
Monitor Emotional Responses: Be mindful of your emotions throughout the workday. If you notice yourself feeling unusually irritable, anxious, or upset, try to trace back to what happened just before those feelings arose. This can help pinpoint specific triggers. Name your feelings to tame your feelings.
Consider Interactions with Others: Pay attention to interactions with colleagues, supervisors, or clients that leave you feeling stressed or upset. Are there certain people or communication styles that tend to trigger negative emotions? Understanding these dynamics can help you navigate them more effectively.
Examine Thought Patterns: Notice the thoughts that arise in response to challenging situations at work. Do you tend to catastrophize, jump to conclusions, or engage in negative self-talk? Identifying these thought patterns can reveal underlying triggers.
Keep a Journal: Writing down your thoughts and feelings throughout the workday can provide valuable insights into your triggers. Note any situations or interactions that provoke a strong emotional response, as well as your thoughts and physical sensations at the time.
Seek Feedback: Sometimes, others may notice patterns or triggers you're unaware of yourself. Consider asking trusted colleagues or a supervisor for feedback on how you react in certain situations and what they perceive as potential triggers for you.
Practice Self-Awareness Techniques: Use mindfulness or relaxation practices to increase self-awareness and emotional regulation skills. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation can help you stay grounded and better identify triggers as they arise.
Over time, all these practices will help regulate the activity of the amygdala and strengthen the prefrontal cortex's ability to exert control over emotions. The brain's capacity for neuroplasticity offers hope for change. As a leader, by recognizing your triggers and actively working to modify your reactions, you can foster a more supportive and collaborative environment within your team. This increased self-awareness enables you to constructively respond to challenges and conflicts, building connection, trust and rapport with your team members. As a result, you become better equipped to understand their perspectives, address their needs, and effectively lead them toward shared goals, ultimately strengthening the overall cohesion and productivity of the team.
